Tresses & I - Sikh Research Institute

Tresses & I

“Why do Sikh girls violate themselves, by cutting their hair?” he asks.


I hear the anguish in his voice.


I see the pain in his eyes.


I say nothing. There is nothing I can say.


For, I too was one of those girls.


Seems like a lifetime ago and yet not so.


In my late teens, I began trimming my hair to take care of the split-ends. Or so I said.

Then a few inches came off, and another few inches as time went by.


To answer this question: Did I feel violated?




On the contrary, I felt liberated.


Foolish thinking, but a prerogative of youth.


1984 transpired.


I stopped trimming my hair.


I don’t know why. But, I did.


Years flew.


Hair grew.


I didn’t dwell on it.


The hair was just there.




Shabd entered my life.


Everything changed.


The hair that was just there—it became my jewel.


I nurtured it.


I honored it.


Because I fell in love with Shabd.


And, when one is in love, one yearns to be drenched in the color of one’s love.


My love affair continues.


My hair grows.


The hair that was once black, is now turning silver.


For someone who hated the mirror, I find myself gazing at it every morning and rejoicing. For my hair has become a work of art. And, I am loving this phase.


And every night, before I go to bed, I brush my long tresses and am filled with gratitude. How lucky can I be?


It’s been quite the journey.


And the journey continues.


Will you, my dearest friend think less of me or will you understand?


That I changed, only because I fell in love.


Nothing more, nothing less.




Inni Kaur is the author of ‘Journey with the Gurus’ series; ‘Sakhi-Time with Nani ji’; and ‘Thank You, Vahiguru.’ She serves as the Chair of the Board of Directors of The Sikh Research Institute.

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